Forty Days and Fifty Nights

Time continues to speed by; I’ve wanted to write a post several times but have had difficulty carving out the time. Of course the longer I wait the more there is to tell. Life here in the house has been very good; today we reach the middle Sunday of the forty days of Lent. Our observance of this season in the brotherhood is something I find both inspiring and challenging. As a house we make some changes to try and quiet life, reflect, take stock, and seek the Lord more earnestly. Through the season our weekday meals are simpler and meatless, we pull out some specific Lenten songs in our morning prayer rooms, observe silence in the house between night prayers and morning prayers, and have a set of special meditations we’ll discuss as a house each evening. Along with our common decisions I’m trying to approach my use of time, energy, and money in a more deliberately Christ centered way. It is rewarding, but as I have experienced in previous years, the sharpness in prayer and connection with God can grow a bit dull by the halfway mark. This year I had quite a bit of time in my schedule the first couple weeks to take stock, but currently things have again ramped up. Essentially all my various responsibilities have notched up a gear or three in the last week. My desk is serving as a reminder of this business by accumulating several new layers of responsibility detritus. Perhaps this is all the more reason to come back to the Lord with all my heart as this season reminds me to do.

As I looked at my planner today I was taken aback by the realization that I’ve only got fifty more nights this side of the Atlantic, May 8th I’ll fly back to Michigan. It is amazing how fast these past six and a half months have gone by, Belfast has grown very dear to my heart in that time. It’s a great place, full of surprises. For instance, I had essentially given up any hope of seeing snow this winter, there were a couple false alarms after Poland, but March 18th is the day. Not only the first snow, but the first thunder and lightning as well in my time here have come today. Already during the time I’ve been writing this post I’m on the third snow flurry which has alternated with blue skies and full sun. I’m hoping that the cold snap doesn’t affect the flowers in bloom all over town. I first noticed the daffodils I planted last October coming up exactly one month ago, and they’ve been blooming since.

Yesterday I was the cook for our house Lord’s Day celebration, as is fitting for the 17th the menu was full on Irish. I made some Colcannon (glorified mashed taters), Irish stew, Mom’s Irish soda bread (a taste that makes St Patrick’s Day in my opinion), an apple crumble for dessert, and of course it all had to be accompanied by a Guinness. Hearty, and tasty fare if I do say so myself.

Last Sunday I was up at 4:30am in order to get Steve Clark, who had been visiting our house for the previous week, to the airport in Dublin for an early flight. We made very good time (surprisingly the traffic was light at that time of day), so there was time to enjoy a cup of coffee and muffin with Steve in the airport café. Steve is the founder of the Servants of the Word brotherhood. Now in his mid sixties he still travels all over the world building the kingdom, and finding time to encourage young guys like me. Having a chance to spend those couple hours with Steve hearing about what he’s been doing, and sharing my reflections on this year was a real privilege. He also had some good tips on sites I might want to visit and observations on Irish history. The breadth of subjects Steve is well informed on is pretty astounding, on some walks we’ve had back in the states we might cover natural history, ecology, and tree identification (he’s sharper then I am), as well as background he knows on whatever author I’m currently reading, and solid advice on what’s going on with me.

Driving back I tuned into a Gaelic radio station, and was reminded of countless Sunday trips in the family van to grandma and grandpas listening to the Thistle and Shamrock on NPR. As the dawning sun brightened the Mourne Mountains I found myself thinking of home. I do miss Michigan, family and friends particularly, but there will be a definite loss when I leave this beautiful island in a short time. It’s surprised me how easy and natural it’s been to start putting down roots here. Somehow that exotic land across the ocean I used to listen to music from on Sunday afternoons has become home to me also. That’s an exciting, and somewhat fearsome aspect of this life I’m choosing in the brotherhood. Part of that decision is a willingness to go where I’m needed, where I’m sent. I know more fully now that I think I can do that, and make a home where I am sent, yet I don’t think it will ever be easy to “leave home”, and I might very well have to do that somewhat often in the years ahead.

The second weekend of Lent we had our brotherhood Lenten retreat. We went to a Benedictine monastery in Rostrevor (southern part of Northern Ireland in the Mourne Mountains). It’s a new establishment, less then ten years old, and the first Benedictine establishment in Ireland for hundreds of years. There are five monks there, the leader (not sure if he’s technically abbot or not) grew up in Northern Ireland and the other four are from France. I’ve stayed at a monastery in New York before but this was a much fuller experience of monastic life. The chanting of the different offices was seriously beautiful, and the liturgy definitely had a French flair. We took four of our meals with the monks in silence. Because we weren’t talking the meals went by very quickly, a bit of a shame because the food was masterfully prepared. I started feeling some calling to become a French Benedictine; although I doubt the reasoning “I really like your singing and cooking would get me too far there.” Trying to communicate without speech can lead to some humorous situations. At one point my encouraging smile and nod of head, meant to convey “that was a fine meal my good man, thank you indeed” was interpreted as “give me another dessert please, I’m a shameless American.” Not being able to gracefully decline I simply ate the extra pie (several of the brothers mentioned the incident to me afterwards, I think they were jealous).

The retreat itself was a really blessed time for me to hear the Lord. During the last few semesters of my degree I had several experiences of all the threads from my different classes illuminating the same themes. This experience of Forest Ecology, Restoration Ecology, and Environmental Psychology all synching up was always exciting, finally getting the big picture in view. I had some serious spiritual synchronicity going on over the retreat, and was much encouraged in the same way. I think there are an awful lot of connections that I miss in life, and I experienced the Lord opening my eyes to some of them during those days. I’m reading a couple books over Lent, Spiritual Combat Revisited and Red Moon Rising, we’ve got a set of scripture meditations for the forty days, I had more space for personal scripture reflection, there were several opportunities to join the monks in chanting Psalms and other prayer, and there was input from Fr. Mark (leader of the monastery) in a couple sessions. All or these seemingly disparate sources connected into a common message. I’ve rarely experienced such clarity from so many directions. Even the elements were in on the act. It was a complete surprise to me, but Saturday night featured a full lunar eclipse (result: eerie red moon). While reflecting some on all these strings coming together on Sunday in my room there was a brief rain storm during full sun, heading to the window I got to enjoy a full rainbow gloriously spanning the green valley the monastery is nestled in. Certainly this coincidence (or confirmation as I see it) would have been more remarkable if I were in Dubai rather then Ireland, but I really believe that rainbow was meant for me. I think the Irish might take their rainbows a bit for granted. I’ve seen more rainbows since coming here then in probably the six previous years in relatively rainy Michigan; I hope I don’t get too familiar to appreciate their beauty and promise.

The previous week I had the chance to give my year review with the brothers in cell group. This is something that the brothers will do every year, evaluating and reflecting on the previous year, what has the Lord done, what struggles and growth have been experienced – in prayer, relationships, and work and service. As I’ve just made my full commitment this was my first chance to do this. I spent a couple mornings taking stock and offering up all that’s happened over the last twelve very eventful months to the Lord. Reflecting on this, and then presenting it to the bros for their comments, input, advice, and prayers was a hugely encouraging exercise. There’s real wisdom in recollecting and giving thanks like this, and I’m grateful that the pattern of brotherhood life pressed me into doing it.

Going back to 9-11 of February there was a big European retreat we hosted in Belfast for different groups related to TEC throughout the UK and the continent. The Kairos weekend, as it was called, involved just over a hundred for the weekend. The theme for the weekend was the passage where Peter gets out of the boat and begins to walk to Jesus on the water. To really give the time justice I should have updated the blog a month ago. It was a good chance to observe how events like this work outside of the US. Overall it’s gratifying to see that the same work and conviction amongst university students exists here in Europe as I know back home. One truly inspiring aspect was seeing how the men and women worked together. Most of the talks were jointly given by a brother and a sister, and I had never seen the synergy and complimentarily of men and women expressed so fully during an event like this, something to learn from for sure.

Over the next few weeks there are two major things for me to prepare for. One is a TEC weekend hosted by out TEC group March 30-April 1. This is a bit confusing, but in short a ‘TEC weekend’ is a highly developed retreat format from which our TEC fellowship here grew out of. Now we’re going to be hosting one, and it takes a fair amount of work to put on. I’m excited for the time, if a little overwhelmed by all that needs to happen before then. Please keep the weekend in prayer, especially that those still deciding if it will work can come. The other, and highly anticipated event, is a visit from my parents and two of my sisters (Kim and Beth) for Easter. About the only thing that could get me more excited is if Amy and John could come as well, but with a wee one and one on the way that just won’t work. So dear reader, there you have it. A meandering, not quite exhaustive, but certainly exhausting summary of the last seven weeks, thanks for reading!